Editing example 2: Technical paper (excerpt)

This is an excerpt from a paper, by a non-native speaker, on washing
photographic films. While the author's meaning is clear, editing removes
grammatical errors and awkward constructions, as shown in bold text.

Original text [107 words]

My approach to measure the kinetics of the washing process was quite different. The considerations of chapter 3 show that latest at the second wash we handle small concentrations. A very fast method of measurement of ion concentrations in water is the measurement of the electrical conductivity. Previous trials with normal mains water showed that after the second wash the conductivity is only controlled by the usual mineral constituents. So I decided to use demineralized water, where a high electrical resistance is really a quality mark for the pureness. The electrical conductivity was determined with an electronic device following a proposal in [2], but with several modifications.

Reproduced by permission of Rolf Süßbrich

Edited text [95 words]

My approach to measuring the kinetics of the washing process was quite different. Chapter 3 shows that after the second wash the concentrations are small. A fast method of measuring ion concentrations in water is to measure the electrical conductivity. Previous trials with normal mains water showed that after the second wash the conductivity is controlled only by the usual mineral constituents. So I decided to use demineralized water, for which a high electrical resistance indicates purity. The electrical conductivity was measured with an electronic device as proposed by Vaessen [2], but with several modifications.